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Last week I received my first caning for over twenty years, and it was suggested that I write to you about my experiences and how I discovered that spanking was just so erotic.

It all goes back to the early eighties after I had left school. As a child I had suffered the odd smack from my mother but my school did not practice corporal punishment although I know my brother had not been so lucky, having been caned at least twice at his school.

My first experiences came when I was an au pair in my early twenties. I applied for the job through an advertisement and was interviewed by a man in his forties who had two boys in their early teens.Tragically his wife had died and he was left to bring up the boys alone.The man was a writer and was extremely busy and as such needed full time help.At the interview he explained that both boys were at a well known public school that was about thirty minutes drive and that part of my duties would be to take them in the morning and collect them in the evening. I would also be expected to effectively run the house, do the shopping, the majority of the cooking and many other tasks.This job had much more responsibility that I had had previously and the money was very much better. Towards the end of the interview he explained his view on discipline. He told me that he had purposely chosen a strict school and that he believed that his boys should be brought up with a very clear line between right and wrong. He then told me that if they stepped out of line they both knew that they risked corporal punishment.

At the time I didn’t say anything but I remember being quite interested.A few days later I received a letter offering me the position and I was to eventually work for this family for many years.

My new boss (the boys father) was a very powerful man who commanded great respect. Going to church every Sunday was a compulsory part of the week and the family led quite a regimented life. It was certainly true that the boys had every opportunity and their father seemed to me to be very anxious to compensate for the awful loss of their Mother. But he also ruled the house with a rod of iron.

It was not long after I arrived that one of the boys was in trouble having to report to their fathers study after supper. It was almost like I imagined the old days and I later learnt that he had been given six whacks with the slipper.When they had committed some sort of offence, their father never lost his temper he just informed whichever of his sons that their behaviour was not acceptable and they knew the consequences, and that they needed to see him after supper.

A little later, the oldest boy had really messed up and was told (in front of the rest of us) that he would be caned that evening. Again I later learnt that he had received six of the best. During their teenage years they must have each been subject to no more than three or four beatings a year, getting the slipper for lesser offences and the cane for more serious crimes.

There were a few that were particularly memorable particularly the first that I witnessed.The eldest boy was uncharacteristically rude to me and unfortunately for him his father heard his remark. He was particularly cross and told his son that he would be punished adding to my great surprise that as he had been rude to me, that he would be caned in front of me. I was asked to come to his study after supper where the boy was told to bend over the desk and grab the far side. I then witnessed my first ever caning six firm strokes. After the last stroke, he was told to stand and apologise to me.

In my third year working for the family, there was a really bad incident whereby the same boy, now aged seventeen was suspended from school for getting really drunk.The Headmaster had called his father and I think there was no doubt about what was going to happen that evening. However, not even I was prepared for the events that unfolded with him being told that he would be caned in front of the rest of the family (including me) and that he was to go upstairs and return in pyjamas.

When he came down, I was astounded when he was told to drop his pyjamas bottoms and to bend over in the middle of the dinning room. He then received a really severe beating getting six strokes to his bare bottom with a cane that seemed longer than the one I had seen used previously.This was the only time that I was aware of either of them being caned on the bare, and I was to learn later that this had been a ‘classic caning’.

All this was having an unexpected effect on me, and I started to fantasise about what it would be like to be ordered about by their father before being told that I was to be punished. I even dreamed about my thoughts.As I mentioned I had never suffered anything more that a smack and the idea of getting the slipper or the cane frightened me. But when I thought about what it might be like, I tended to ignore the fact that it would be painful and concentrate on the idea of being dominated. Often I would lay in bed thinking about how I could engineer a punishment but by the time I woke up the idea just seemed ridiculous.

Some time later, I scrapped the car on my way back from taking the boys to school. It was careless and it wasn’t the first time, which made me worried about telling the boys father. As expected, he was not too pleased and said in an exasperated way “What am I to do with you?” Without thinking, I told him that he could also treat me in the same way as the boys. He looked at me strangely and asked if I was suggesting having my bottom whacked. I replied that if he felt that I deserved such a punishment I would accept. He asked me what I had in mind and I told him I would leave it up to him. I had gone too far to turn back and inside I was in turmoil about what I had done.

After a moment he replied that I should come with him to his study. He asked me if I had even been spanked to which I replied ‘never’. He then asked if when I had said ‘treating me in the same way as the boys’ I was thinking of getting the slipper or the cane. In truth I had witnessed two canings but had never seen him giving the slipper. I told him I would leave it up to him.

He then sat down and was quiet for a few moments before telling me that perhaps I should have a choice. He told me that I was wearing jeans that were quite thick and would give me a reasonable amount of protection too much in his opinion for the slipper to be effective.Therefore I could choose between the slipper without my jeans or a standard caning with my jeans.

I remember being horrified by the prospect of taking down my jeans I had suggested being whacked, but had never even thought that he might want me to partially undress. I was also not sure if he meant my knickers as well if I opted for the slipper. I decided to be brave and take the cane with my jeans in place.

All the time he was quite masterly, which was what I had fantasised about but the reality was different and I really wondered what I had got myself into. He told me to bend over his desk reaching for the far side and with my legs straight out behind me, and that he would give me the traditional six strokes. He added that as I had never been caned before he would start off quite gently for the first three but that damaging the car again was a serious matter and that the last three would be proper cane strokes.

As I waited over his desk, I heard him go to the cupboard and remove a cane, which he ‘swished’ through the air. I well remember the feeling of extreme anticipation as I waited. I then felt the cane touch my bottom before I received my very first stroke of the cane. It was right across the middle of my bottom and certainly made a sting. The next two were very similar, not too bad but made me dread what was going to happen with the last three. I had to wait a long time before he gave me the fourth, which made me gasp and he told to remain still.The fifth and sixth were similarly hard and completely different to the first three. I stood up and rubbed my bottom through my jeans as he smiled and told me that I had done well and that perhaps in future any other misdemeanours could be dealt with in a similar way. My curiosity had been satisfied and in reality the pain was wearing off quite quickly but I told him that I would leave that up to him if he felt that I deserved more.

Later as the pain became a rather pleasant ‘glow’ I thought about my caning and what it had been like to be ordered over his desk. I was pleased that I had suggested ‘being treated like the boys’.

A few days later we having a cup of tea in the kitchen and he asked me what I had thought of being caned. His question took me by surprise and I told him that I had deserved my punishment and in any case it hadn’t been too bad. He then asked me a question that I will always remember ‘did I know that some girls actually enjoy being spanked’.

I did not know what to say, and didn’t want to admit that I had secretly fantasised about being punished by him. He smiled at my awkwardness and said that we’d see what the future brought. I thought about his short conversation a great deal and imagined what it might be like to get a more severe caning with six proper strokes. I also fantasised about being ordered out of my jeans and getting punished across my bare bottom and I remembered the time he had severely caned the eldest boy on the bare after he’d been suspended from school.

It was probably about three months later when I received my next punishment. It was actually over a very minor matter (I had forgotten to do something), and in a very casual way he remarked that perhaps I needed to go over his desk. I’d thought a lot about being caned again, and he was offering me another opportunity. A caning as a punishment for my relatively insignificant error was certainly extremely severe but that didn’t matter the fact was that I wanted to feel the cane again and I think he knew. I told him ok.

Moments later we were in his study and he told me I could have the same choice as before (six strokes with the cane across the seat of my jeans or the slipper with them removed) except that if I chose the cane it would be six proper strokes. I was still not ready to drop my jeans and elected for the cane. However I knew that this time there would be easy strokes. He cleared some papers off his desk and told me to bend across the desk as I had before. He told me that I had a great bottom and that he would enjoy caning it. Moments later I received my first stroke which was certainly ‘sharp’.As I recall this first proper caning, I remember it being painful but within the limit that I could endure. He made it last quite a few minutes as he spaced out the strokes. By the time I had had the sixth stroke I had probably been over his desk for at least two or three minutes. I stood up and rubbed my bottom as he put the cane away. He then asked me if I had enjoyed my ???punishment’. I cannot remember my exact words but said something like it hadn’t been too bad. He replied that I had just received a proper standard caning and that he suspected that a bit of me found some pleasure. And in any case we both knew that my error was hardly worthy of a caning.

At this point he asked me if I had heard of Janus magazine. I told him I hadn’t and too my huge surprise he took a couple of copies of your magazine from one of his drawers and gave them to me telling me that I should have a read. I was amazed that such a magazine existed and later in the privacy of my bedroom I learnt for the first time about CP being a fetish. In many ways reading Janus released me from feeling guilty about myself and thinking that I was extremely odd to fantasise about being ordered about and caned.

Looking at the many pictures, I also realised that it would be a matter of time before I would be getting a beating without the protection of my jeans. Indeed this became my number one fantasy, which I often thought about as I ‘brought myself off ’.

A day or so later he asked me what I thought about the magazines, to which I replied that they were very interesting. We then got into a conversation where he admitted that he very much enjoyed caning my bottom and that anytime I wanted a session, I only had to let him know.

He also talked about the punishments that he gave the boys and wanted to emphasis that there was no connection between what he might enjoy as a Janus reader and punishments that he felt the boys deserved as an essential part of their discipline.

For the following months, every so often he would make some sort of complaint and ask if I wanted to ‘go to the study’. It probably seems odd, but I was in my early twenties and he was twenty years older, but I had never experienced the joy of being completely in someone’s ‘charge’ and being dominated. Every time I was offered a session, I agreed, and I was probably getting the cane most months and he continued to pass me copies of Janus which I very much enjoyed.

About a year after my first caning I had another accident in the family car. I was pulling out of the school having dropped off the boys and actually went into the back of one of the parent’s cars whilst I was putting my lipstick on. It was entirely my fault and after I had exchanged details with the other driver, went home to face the music. As I drove back I started to think about how I would be ‘punished’ this time and that I was probably in a bit more trouble that normal, and I remember that I started to feel a little damp at the thought.

It wasn’t long before we were both standing in front of the car looking at the damage. And it also didn’t take long for him to suggest that we should immediately go to his study. He was really quite cross and immediately produced two canes, one that he had always used and a second longer straight cane I knew I was in for it. He told me that this was more serious and that he felt that my punishment should be ‘escalated’. He went onto tell me that so far all my beatings thus far had been what he termed ‘standard canings’, and that he felt such a beating would be inappropriate for something that was more serious. He explained the options were an extended standard caning with double or triple the number of strokes, or a ‘house caning’ that would involve six standard strokes across my bare bottom, or lastly a ‘classic caning’ which was also six strokes given to my bare bottom but involved significantly more severe strokes with the longer cane. He added that the different names came from when he had been at school, with a standard caning being given by form masters or prefects, a house caning being given by the house master and a classic caning being reserved for serious punishment by the Headmaster.

He went on to tell me that a house caning was not an option as I would probably enjoy it, and that I could have a choice of a triple standard caning and repaying half of the cost of repairing the cars myself or if I wanted to be brave I could opt for a classic caning without any need to repay for the damage. I knew that my most powerful fantasy involved me par tially undressing for the cane.The triple caning would involve eighteen strokes and that sounded too many and would also cost me a lot of money. I once again thought about taking his second option, which would require undressing.The idea excited me although I was also worried about the pain of what he described as ‘significantly more severe strokes’ and I remembered the caning he gave to one of his son’s on the bare. However I told myself it couldn’t be too bad as it was only six strokes.

I decided to ‘go for it’, and told him I would accept ‘a classic caning’, as he put it. He told me that as I had probably cost him £500 for the damage to both cars, he felt that he was entitled to enjoy delivering a real thrashing and at the same time giving me an entirely different experience. Unusually I was wearing a skirt, which he told me to remove. Despite my fantasy, it was very embarrassing as I undid my skirt before pushing it down my legs and stepped out of it. I stood before him in tights and knickers and I remember the feeling of intense embarrassment together with powerful feelings that I now know to be the excitement felt by a ‘submissive’. I pushed my tights and knickers down together and asked him if lowering them enough, to which he told me to take them right off. Moments later I was standing in front of him completely nude from the waist down. He then told me that a ‘classic caning’ would star t with a little humiliation and anticipation, and that I was to put my hands behind my head and take two steps back and remain standing for a minute or so as he looked through some papers.As I stood there I could not help feeling that he was constantly looking up at my pubic region. He then told me to turn round so that he could see my bottom. Despite my fear and extreme embarrassment, all this attention was making me quite damp!

He then told me that a classic caning involved a different position, and that I was to bend over and touch my toes with my legs slightly apar t. I have always been quite fit and I had no problem bending over and keeping my legs straight.As I waited for the inevitable, the anticipation was incredible with the combination of the genuine fear of not knowing how much more painful a classic caning would be, especially as he had promised something very different. I was also bending over in the knowledge that he would be focussing on my bare bottom and probably between my slightly spread legs. He told me that my bottom in jeans was great but nothing like my bottom in the flesh. He told me that my caning would star t shor tly and that I was to remain bent over and try not to make a noise. During the next five minutes I went through what I can only describe as a devastating experience.With no warning I received my first ever stroke on the bare, and well remember the shock.There was no comparison to previous canings that I had come to quite enjoy this was pure pain. He made me wait a long time before my next stroke, which made me cry out.

This caning was many years ago and I can remember every detail.The third stroke came and was described by him ‘as a beauty’.This was completely different to anything I had experienced before and there was simply no comparison to my previous canings. He was still leaving a big pause between each stroke and I was only half way through. I forgot about my nudity and concentrated on staying in position.The four th and fifth strokes came slightly closer together, but there was at least a sixty second delay before I received my final stroke, which predictably was extremely hard. I was told to remain in position. Any thoughts that I might have had about being dominated and enjoying myself had gone. I was a real mess and was just so shocked about how painful a ‘classic caning’ had been. Also I had discovered that touching your toes, whilst more erotic, is a very hard position to maintain during a severe caning. Eventually he told me to stand and face him as he asked if he had succeeded to going beyond my ‘comfor t zone’ and thereby giving me a real punishment, adding that the combination of the longer cane, being caned on the bare and a significant increase in the severity of the strokes would made a considerable difference. I told him he certainly taken me beyond my ‘comfor t zone’. He then told me to once again put my hands behind my head for a few minutes.The pain died away after a few hours, but for many days I was reminded every time I sat down. My bottom carried the marks for well over a week I had been excited about the thought of getting caned on the bare, but the reality was not nice. However later, as I relived the caning I became very aroused.

Inevitably that was not the last time I received the cane on the bare something he always reserved for me when I had done something slightly more serious than a minor mistake. During the following three years I continued to get the cane across my jeans every so often, but on four further occasions I took it on the bare. Only one of these was another classic caning, which was given for yet another bump in the car.That time I knew what to expect and was genuinely terrified as I prepared myself and bent over to once more touch my toes.The other three were ‘House Canings’ with me bent across his desk, and were a great deal less serious and although sharp actually quite nice.

At the time I never quite got used to removing my clothes below the waist in preparation, but I did get used to the increased pain, and I knew all too well about the differences between the various canings.

Once the boys left home and went to University, my job came to an end and we parted on very good terms. That was almost twenty years ago and since then I have been married and divorced twice. Neither of my husbands were the slightest bit interested in spanking, and now that I am single again I decided to contact my old boss to see if he was interested in meeting up. Predictably he was and I travelled up to see him and we had a wonderful lunch. Inevitably the conversation drifted to CP and he told me that he still possessed a cane if I was interested. Of course after so many years of being slightly frustrated with not having a par t of my sexuality satisfied, that afternoon I received my first caning for nearly twenty years.After some discussion he suggested that I should take a ‘house caning’. I am now in my mid forties and he is in his mid sixties, but I still have a good figure and as I took everything off below the waist he was very complimentary. Bending back over his desk brought back many memories of the anticipation of waiting for the cane and predictably after such a long time six ‘standard’ strokes across my bare bottom was more painful than I expected, and he was just as accurate as I remember. However I very much enjoyed the whole experience, and it when it was over that he suggested that I write this letter.

Although I know just how painful a ‘classic caning’ is, there is a bit of me that fantasises about taking such a severe punishment again.We will wait and see, but I am sure that having ‘gone back’ to him, it will not be the last time!

Check out our other free classic spanking and caning stories from the pages of Janus and Februs